Maybe We Should Just Call Them The FAILsox

I think I might have to check in with a counselor if I find myself agreeing with one more Phil Rogers column.  But only after Crazy Uncle Milton agrees to get himself some help first.

Rogers conveniently points out that Kenny Williams made some offseason deals that look questionable now.  And while Williams' cross-town counterpart gets railroaded on a daily basis, Williams skates away untouched.

How?  Why?  Where is the outrage?

Simply stated: White Sox fans don't care about the White Sox.

This poll on Dave Kaplan's blog (screen grab taken Thursday) is only the tip of the iceberg.  How telling is it about a fan base that can claim the most recent major championship getting out-voted by a team that hasn't won a title since 1998 and a franchise that just became relevant over the last year in a half?

Chicago is a Bears town.  There isn't a doubt in my mind.  It's the only franchise in this city everyone in the area can wrap their arms around.  The White Sox had their chance, but passed on the opportunity because they found it to be easier to just take shots at North Siders rather than using the ultimate prize to build up its fandom.

The problem with a healthy chunk of White Sox fans is that they treat the Cubs like the jilted lover they claim to not care about, but secretly stalk via social networking sites just to keep tabs.

Speaking of which, I've seen more Facebook status updates, tweets, texts and other sorts of messages about the Cubs' failures from White Sox fans than I have from Cubs fans.  True story.  They'll say "hey, it's a rivalry thing" despite the fact that the only rivalry happens to be an inter-city ordeal that only counts six games in the standings per year.  At this stage of the game, White Sox fans are acting like the anti-establishment high schooler who acts a-fool only because one of his popular buddies is the lunatic that happens to lead the asylum.

The lunatic that leads this asylum is clearly Steve Stone.  Via his (protected) Twitter, Stone has ridden Jim Hendry's moves harder than a Brokeback Mountain joke.  Yet, it must be as if he is wearing Hawk Harrelson's eye patch because all he'd have to do is look outside of his own announcing booth and see that Williams has made similar moves.

Where are the outraged tweets about losing a starting pitcher who is 14-9 with a 2.91 earned run average in Atlanta?  Or the ones about an outfielder with 27 homers and 79 ribbies?  I'm not sure, but I'm still waiting for the Stone Pony to speak his "truth" via a Twitter update any minute now.

When the deal first happened, M.J. Hartwig noted that the White Sox sold Swisher too soon.  Finding room for Dirty 30 would have been difficult, but because of his versatility, he could have been used all over the field, which would have benefited the team over the course of a 162 game season.  He's seen his homers, ribbies and OPS skyrocket since joining the Yanks and a good chunk of that has to do with hitting in a ballpark that rivals the size of a little league field.  But with Jermaine Dye and Jim Thome off the books starting in 2010, one would have to think the White Sox could have used Swisher somewhere in the order.

As for Vazquez, he was the White Sox's version of Jason Marquis.  Good, not great, but always reliable.  Little Game Javy has thrown at least 200 innings in nine of his last 10 years.  The one year in which he didn't reach the 200-inning plateau was in 2004 where he threw 198 innings.  Vazquez has been a strikeout artist, reaching 200 punch outs in five different years, including each of the past three seasons.  Has his game hit another level because he plays in the National League?  Certainly.  But it's not like the White Sox are going up against the 1975 Reds, 1927 Yankees or one of those vintage Colorado Rockies teams for a division crown.  It's the American League Central, where the Royals and Indians battle it out for gagging rights.

Like it or not, Vazquez could have been an integral part of a winner.  Proof of it is the fact that he has thrived under baseball's best manager Tony La Russa Bobby Cox.

Just for fun, imagine this starting rotation in 2010:

• Mark Buehrle
• John Danks
• Gavin Floyd
• Jake Peavy
• Javier Vazquez

OK, the dream sequence is now over.  It is very likely that Tyler Flowers pans out to be a productive catcher.  And pitchers Jhonny Nunez and Jeff Marquez could turn out to be fine ball players down the line as well.  But Williams made the same mistakes Hendry did.

By subtracting valuable pieces from the team's 2008 division championship run, Williams failed to add pieces for 2009.

I know the classic response to this blog will be something to the extent of "blah, blah, blah, 2005, blah, blah, cubs suck, blah" -- but judging by this poll -- the only people that cared about the 2005 White Sox happened to be the handful of die-hards that have been rollin' with the South Siders since it was called Comiskey Park.

Wang hit hard, Swisher cleans up late

Sure, it's a headline ... but it's also a headline.

The New York Yankees got the snot knocked out of them by the Tampa Bay Rays in St.Petersberg, Fla., on Monday. The Rays beat the Yanks 15-5 as starter Chien-Ming Wang allowed eight runs (all earned) on six hits in only one inning of work.

So, when Wang made a premature exit, it was only fitting that resident punchline Nick Swisher wrapped up the loss by pitching a scoreless bottom of the eighth. Not to mention he struck out a batter (insert reference to Swisher swinging-and-missing on a college cutie here) and hit his third homer of the year.

Swisher is currently batting .450, that's .550 points below where he wants to be.

And that's batting 1.000!

Why the idiots shouldn't run the asylum...

Media credit: [mattrosenthalblog.blogspot.com]

Bloggers have come a long way from the days in which they sat in their parents basements, going on internet dates and plotting out another sequel to "Revenge of the Nerds."

Except for this guy.

It's frustrating because as a Cubs fan, I go to his site not to get a hot stove update, but instead for a laugh.

I really didn't want to do this, but this post was the last straw.

I guess we can start with the top half of the post in which he incorrectly spells CHRIS DeLuca's first name - which he spells correctly in the first line. Now this could be just an oversight, but it happens all the time. It's frustrating. I know I'm not perfect, but there are too many grammatical and spelling errors that frustrate the heck out of me.

OK, now that we've got that little pet peeve of mine out of the way. Let's get to some content. He wants the Cubs to think about a deal acquiring Javier Vazquez and/or Nick Swisher of the Chicago White Sox.

First of all, why would you want to pick up a player in which the manager calls out said player for not being a big game pitcher. Especially when your goal is to win the ultimate big game: The final game of the World Series.

But I'll get over that because if you can throw out Vazquez's talents over 30 starts in the regular season you're going to get a pretty good season out of a very talented arm.

But let's move on to Swisher.

"Nick Swisher is also a very interesting scenario. Swisher is a switch hitting First Baseman and Outfielder that could really benefit the Cubs."

How? As a first baseman? Is he really better than Derrek Lee? No. Next question.

"He does not hit for a high average, just a .244 lifetime hitter, but does have a decent OBP of .354 throughout his career. He is a good power hitter( hitting 21+ homers since 2005) that would look nice batting anywhere in the lineup. He is a decent fielder with a .991 fielding percentage throughout his career. Ichiro's is .993 to do a comparison."

Oh no he didn't!

Look the .354 career OBP is less than inspiring. Want to know what's even less inspiring? The .332 OBP he posted last season. He's a decent fielder? Did he really just compare Nick Frickin Swisher with Ichiro, who can play right field and center field, has a cannon for an arm and "more range than a Texan" as rapper Ludacris once eloquently put it.

Swisher doesn't have the range to play center and he's not that much better at first.

"He would be a solid addition to this team and the Cubs should add him to their list of guys that consist of Giles, Hermida, Abreu, and Ibanez."

.219/.332/.410 sounds like a great addition for a team that didn't hit, get on base or slug anything but a water heater in their brief playoff appearance (if you would call it that) against the L.A. Dodgers.

Let's bring back Cesar Izturis while we're at it.

He goes on to note that Swisher is owed $20.05 million over the next three years. Sounds like money well spent for a guy who is just a "good clubhouse guy."

I hope Kevin Millar looks at this post and basis his free agent contract based off what he learned about Swisher's contract in this post.

That's it. I'm done. I've got to go to class.

Nick Swisher: Batting 1.000

Photo Credit: Chicago Sun-Times

Last time I saw Nick Swisher, it was at a bar, with a pretty girl on his side. He was giving out free Bud Lights.

Never told him I was a Cubs fan. All I needed to tell him was that I was a fan of free beer.

When you're making $3.5 million in a year in which you hit .219, you should celebrate accordingly.

Also, when you're making $3.5 million, it doesn't matter what you're hitting. One magical motion bumps that average to 1.000.

I can't wait until Jonathan Papelbon or Prince Fielder get s ahold of him.

'Til then, have a GRAND day.