Three Years Of Byrd Droppings Coming To Wrigley Field

Friends and family of TBDS sure know how to throw a welcome home party.  The drinks were flowing freely as we listened to tales of how Uncle Hawk and Carl Yastrzemski saved America from the Soviets in 1978.

Cubs GM Jim Hendry came over too and according to sources had a few too many, resulting in today's signing of Marlon Byrd.

At least, that would be the only way I could justify a three-year back-loaded deal for a hitter with a career OPS of .762 that will be 35 by the time his contract ends in 2012.

Byrd had an OK year in 2009, posting a .283/.329/.476/.808 slash line with 20 home runs and 71 runs batted in.  That is one of the two nice things I have to say about this deal.  The other is that in his three years with the Texas Rangers under the tutelage of newly minted Cubs hitting coach Rudy Jaramillo, Byrd averaged a .295/.352/.468/.820 slash line with 13 homers and 70 ribbies.

Now, here comes the kick to the crotch that comes with signing Byrd.

With a .340 career on-base percentage and a 59-percent success rate in the stolen base department, the Cubs can't put him at the top of the line-up where the team has had its most gaping hole since Kenny Lofton was not brought back.  He hit 20 home runs last season, but only after hitting 20 total dingers in the two seasons before his contract year.  So, he's not really a protoypical middle-of-the-order hitter.

He is an above average defender.  That's all he's got.

Three years, $15 million for catching the ball.  Sam Field does that for the league minimum.  Not that Fuld is deserving of an everyday job at the major league level, but Hendry's latest deal is a harsh reminder that the Cubs have the dumbest general manager in baseball.

That nice .283/.329/.476/.808 line Byrd posted in 2009 marked only the second season of Byrd's eight-year career in which he played at least 130 games and the first since his rookie year in 2003 with the Philadelphia Phillies.

If the Cubs wanted a durable outfield option after watching Milton Bradley miss his fair share of games due to various nagging injuries, Byrd was not the guy.

In the 845 plate appearances in the 223 games (188 starts) played in the day time, Byrd posted a .255/.311/.403/.714 line.  It is an eye-opening drop in production from the .289/.351/.429/.781 line in 2,124 plate appearances in night games.  It doesn't get better (in fact, it gets worse) when you examine Byrd's numbers at Wrigley Field, where he owns a career .206/.341/.206/.547 line in 10 games (42 plate appearances).

So if the Cubs were looking to add a guy who was familiar with success at Wrigley Field and during day games, they failed.  Miserably.

Did I mention that Byrd is on board for the next three years?  As Tom Ricketts tries to dig out of the hole Hendry dug in the first place at the end of the Tribune Co.'s reign of terror, the task becomes a little more difficult as the Cubs GM lets the ink dry on the team's most recent back-loaded contract to a player past his prime.

And to think, I thought it couldn't get worse than signing Aaron Miles on New Year's Eve a year ago.  We've got to keep that man away from the champagne when the holiday season rolls around in 2010.

Be Careful What You Wish For: Milton Bradley Has Been Traded

Chicago media members and Cubs fans everywhere got their collective wish granted on Friday as Jim Hendry traded Milton Bradley to Seattle.

Cubs fans everywhere celebrated the deal as if the team had won its first World Series since 1908.  So, what did Hendry get to make everyone so giddy?

Carlos Silva.

That's right sports fans.  The Cubs just acquired a contract that would be harder to get rid of and who is just as much of a prick.

Only the Cubs would be able to trade Bradley and get a worse player in return.

Can you say Cutlerfucked?

By acquiring Silva, Hendry added to the roster a guy who owns a 29-47 record, 1.54 WHIP and a 6.29 earned run average in the four years since finishing with a 9-8 record.  Take note that it was 2005 when Silva last owned a respectable record, earned run average and WHIP.  In 2006, Silva led the American League with 38 home runs.  That would be a great statistic for an outfield that combined to hit 43 home runs last season until you realize that Silva is a starting pitcher rather than an everyday player.

In a park notorious for giving up the long ball, why on earth would the Cubs trade a serviceable major league outfielder for absolute cow dung.  If you thought Kevin Gregg made your blood boil, watching Silva take the bump will be like watching six or seven innings worth of Gregg.

For all of his flaws, at least Crazy Uncle Milton didn't suck.

Last season, Silva posted a 1-3 record, an 8.60 ERA, a 1.714 WHIP in only 8 games.  Why 8 games?  Because he was hurt most of the year.  For a front office to refuse salary arbitration to Rich Harden because they feared the oft-injured pitcher would accept it to go out and bring in someone who made six starts in the same season Harden made 26 reminds me that Jim Hendry is in fact baseball's dumbest person.

He makes Cardinals fans look like Einstein.

And MLB.com's Carrie Muskat has the nerve to wish Cubs fans a Merry Christmas.  Merry Christmas?  A good Christmas present would have been trading Bradley to Seattle for Ken Griffey Jr. and a time machine that can be set to 1997 upon Junior's arrival to Chicago.

A few days later, Muskat suggested Lou Piniella would have a "merrier holiday" without Bradley.  Possibly.  That is until he realizes his best option to start in center field is Sam Fuld.  After that, the following conversation occurred

Lou: Jim, where the fuck is my center fielder?
Jim: What, you don't like Sam Fuld? I think he'll be fine.
Lou: Why do you force me to field a team of midgets? Can I have someone tall enough to ride the fucking Tea Cups at Disney World?
Jim: Of course I could. We've got options.
Lou: Alright. What are our options?
Jim: Marlon Byrd. Scott Podsednik. Rick Ankiel

At that point, Sweet Uncle Lou has a few options of his own.  Option No. 1 is to punch Hendry in his throat. Option No. 2 is to kick Hendry in the stomach.  Option No. 3 is throwing Hendry off the top of a very tall building after using a combination of the first two options.

That's it, Cubs fans.  Your over-the-top hatred of Milty has led us to believe that our best outfield options are the white version of Juan Pierre, a once-roided up ex-Cardinals outfielder and a former Texas Rangers outfielder coming off a career year.

At this point, the highlight of the offseason could come if Matt Capps nixes the Washington Nationals and signs with the Cubs.

Furthermore, the Milton Bradley Era is another reminder of the stupidity that has been the past two prior Cubs offseasons.  Let's run them down, shall we?

2009 Offseason

• Release All-Star closer who converted 34 saves without offering arbitration and getting draft picks and return.
• Trade once untouchable prospect for Kevin Gregg to replace All-Star closer.
  
• Trade popular second baseman who will remain nameless for prospects to replenish a bare farm system.
  
• Replace said second baseman (who hit .285/.376/.481/.857 with 21 HR & 87 RBIs) with Aaron Miles.
• Trade former No. 1 prospect for another team's former No. 1 prospect, trade that prospect for Aaron Heilman.
• Trade over-paid, inning-eating back-of-the-rotation guy, pay him to eat innings elsewhere.
• Sign guy who had never hit more than 22 home runs or drive in more than 77 RBIs to be middle-of-the-order left-handed bat.

2010 Offseason

• Dump Kevin Gregg
• Dump Aaron Miles
• Dump Aaron Heilman
• Dump Milton Bradley
• Get over-paid, inning-eating back-of-the-rotation guy 
  

Think about it, folks.  The Cubs brought in Gregg, Miles, Heilman and Bradley for the 2009 season and paid them a collective $13.025 million (not to mention the $875,000 Hendry gave to the Rockies to take Jason Marquis off his hands) for one year and 83 stinkin' wins.

Oh, lest we forget the Cubs traded their best bench bat to Oakland so they could get rid of Miles in the first place in exchange for spare parts and let their best second-half starter walk away without getting anything in return.

And the 2010 Cubs are supposed to be better?

Someone wake me up when it's 2011, I might have to go into hibernation once Opening Day rolls around.

Starting In Right Field For Your 2010 Cubs: Milton Bradley

The Winter Meetings have come and gone, yet, Milton Bradley is still a Cub.

Are you surprised?  You shouldn't be.

The Cubs butchered this whole ordeal from Day 1.  And not Day 1 of the offseason, either.  It all began when they signed Bradley in the first place. Three-years and $30 million for a player who has been on seven different teams in his big league career and had accumulated 500 plate appearances only twice in his entire career. 

Signing a guy coming off posting a .999 OPS to lead the American League is a good idea.  Signing the guy for three years when he hadn't spent more than two full seasons on a team since the first three years of this decade is a bad one.

Then, there would be the handling of Crazy Uncle Milton, who was treated as if he had "fragile" stamped on his forehead.  It all fell apart in September when Hendry & Co. botched the season-end suspension.  Rather than keep in in house, the Cubs pissed all over any trade value Bradley would have had by throwing him under the bus.

Hendry could have spent the offseason saying, "We sat Milty the last two weeks of the season because we wanted to have him healthy going into an offseason where we knew we'd try to trade him.  He wasn't a fit with our team, but he could fit yours."  Now, there's no hiding behind that anonymity because everyone knows Bradley's a dickhead.

The sad this is that Bradley has handled his demotion well.  He hasn't been seen or heard from, which is good.  It might make things easier come Spring Training when the Cubs have to mend fences after publicly trying to trade their starting right fielder who is set to earn $21 million over the next two seasons.

Oh, and just to make things even more difficult, the guy who has nothing to do with baseball operation has to open his stinkin' mouth.  Go away, Crane Kenney.  Do so as quick as possible.

If you thought he was a dick before, imagine how much more of a dick he could be if he wanted to be after this failed fiasco.

And for the second straight year, the Chicago Cubs have been handcuffed by a contract Jim Hendry outbid no one but himself to sign.  Last year, Hendry was so dedicated to unloading Jason Marquis' $9.875 million contract, it bogged down any progress in getting his guy -- Jake Peavy.  This season, Hendry found himself strapped with Crazy Uncle Milton's contract, so much so it proved to be one of the deciding factors in Hendry's inability to get his guy -- again.  This time it was Curtis Granderson.

The New York Daily News has it covered.  And by "it" I mean, manager Lou Piniella being pissed about not getting what he wants for the second straight off-season.

"Our primary need is an outfielder who can hit fifth, and Granderson was our No. 1 choice," Piniella said Wednesday. "There was just no way we could get him, and once again the Yankees swooped in and got their man. I know he struck out a lot, but that's the product of being in that lineup over in Detroit where they all come out swinging. He probably tried to do too much last year and he was trying to pull the ball too much. When he gets over to the Yankees, he'll automatically become more selective just by association."

It's December, and Sweet Uncle Lou is already pissed off about the prospects of the 2010 season.

There is no secret that Piniella is entering lame-duck status next season, but I'm not sure why.  If anything, he should be given an extension for what he did last year.  Piniella has been the most successful manager the Cubs have had in my 23-year lifetime.

Of the 16 managers the Cubs have had since 1986, only three have been at .500 or better.  Piniella is one of them, and before he took over, you've got to go back to Jim Lefebvre, who was 162-162 in two years with the team.

At times, it looked like Piniella was lost and being out-managed.  And while Piniella might have lost a step in those too-tight-for-comfort baseball pants, he has yet to lose his eye for talent.

Meanwhile, Jim Hendry seems to be the Stevie Wonder of spotting talent.

Let's compare what Piniella has done in regard to talent recognition compared to what Hendry has done.  For the sake of space, I'll choose six.

Hendry:

• Identified Alfonso Soriano as a lead-off hitter and center fielder (people forget that one)
  
• Outbid himself to sign Milton Bradley, Jason Marquis to three year deals for no reason
• Failed to identify Josh Hamilton as a possible outfield option
• Traded three valuable pieces for one year of Juan Pierre
• Traded the once untouchable (and under team control for several years) Jose Ceda for one (very bad) year of Kevin Gregg
  
• Traded Greg Maddux for Cesar Izturis.
  

Piniella:

• Sent Carlos Marmol & Angel Guzman from the rotation to the 'pen
• Moved Ryan Dempster from the 'pen to the rotation
• Replaced Cesar Izturis with Ryan Theriot
• Had the foresight to play Geovany Soto in a playoff race in 2007, and let him flourish in 2008
• Sent Michael Barrett to the bench before Hendry eventually sent him packing in 2007

The Cubs should find a way to remove Hendry from making player personnel decisions, while somehow giving that task to Piniella upon his retirement.  Believe it or not, Piniella changed the mindset of fans and the way this franchise looks at some of its young talent.
Piniella's biggest miscues as a manager (Soriano in the lead-off spot, Gregg as closer) came about because of Hendry's miscalculations.


Here's hoping Henry's latest gaffe is his last.  Until then, start training your eyes to see No. 21 in right field ... again.

Curtis Granderson Is Gonna Be A Yankee

It certainly looks like Curtis Granderson will be roaming the spacious center field of the (new!) Yankee Stadium come Opening Day 2010.  I know a lot of Cubs fans wanted him, but I'm not sure why.

Corey Patterson is just burning up the league right now.  At the age of 30, he's tearing the cover off the ball and still is in the prime of his career.  He hit 25 home runs, knocked in 107 runs batted in and stole 31 bases.

(Man whispers in my ear.)

Really?  That didn't happen.  He only hit .071 in 11 games with Milwaukee last year.  That's too bad.  Oh, now I see what you're saying.  Those were his projected stats over 650 plate appearances in 2003.  My bad.

Well, what about Felix Pie?  He's got to be coming off a monster season.  Why would you want to let him go and replace him with Granderson?  OK, so he's not an All-Star yet.  But he did post a .283/.341/.451/.792 line with 15 HRs 57 RBIs and 17 steals.  Under Rudy Jaramillo, Pie must be poised for a breakout 2010 year, he'll be 25 in February.

(Man returns.  Whispers in my ear yet again.)

Oh.  My mistake.  Those were Pie's 2006 numbers after a full season of Triple A ball.

And he was traded to Baltimore last season?  Cool.  Who did the Cubs get in return?  Brian Roberts?  Miguel Tejada?  Erik Bedard?  Nick Markakis?

Garrett Olson?  Henry Williamson?

Never heard of 'em.

Oh well.  Who needs Granderson anyway?

I understand why some general managers are cautious to give up their prospects.  All I'm saying is that Starlin Castro better have Ernie Banks' power numbers, Ozzie Smith's defense and Hanley Ramirez's speed.

Thomas Diamond: Jim Hendry's Latest Rehab Project

Cubs GM Jim Hendry has an obsession with rehab that would make Lindsay Lohan look jealous.  Let's welcome Thomas Diamond (via MLBTR) as the newest addition to Wrigley Field -- which is now apparently a halfway house for failed pitching prospects.

Oh yeah, he had Tommy John surgery in 2007. 
Hope Larry Rothschild has fun with that.


Via MLB Draft analysis (sic'd):

LONG FRAME. STRONG, THICK, ATHLETIC BODY. LONG ARMS. BIG HANDS & FEET. GOOD PITCHERS BUILD. SIMILAR TO ROGER CLEMENS. HIGH 3/4 TO OVER HEAD ARM SLOT. SOLID DELIVERY. GOOD EXTENTION ON RELEASE. FB EXPLODES LATE IN ZONE, RIDES IN ON RHH. ALSO PITCHES IN TO LHH. CB HAS BIG, 12-6 BREAK. SLIDER OCCAISIONALLY TIGHT. EXCELLENT MOVEMENT & DECEPTION TO CHANGE UP. RHP W/ A BIG TIME ARM & DOMINANT STUFF TO BECOME A 1 OR 2 STARTER AT ML LEVEL. VERY GOOD MOUND PRESENCE. AGGRESSIVE APPROACH.

Successful MLBers that followed: Jered Weaver, Billy Butler, Stephen Drew and Phillip Hughes.

Just Wondering About That Whole Pennant Race Thing

I only read David Kaplan's crap blog when I need some comic relief in my life.  This blog was no exception:

"[A]fter seeing Colorado struggle last weekend [Cubs GM Jim] Hendry decided to go all in and try to make the playoffs rather than dealing one of his best arms."

If that's the reason Hendry declined to trade Rich Harden to the Twins, I kind of wish Hendry would have decided to go "all in" earlier.  I'm still waiting for the left-handed power-hitting, run-producing right fielder, a second baseman that is taller than your average circus midget and a closer who doesn't lead the league in walk-off losses.

With All That Money, Maybe Tom Ricketts Can Buy Jim Hendry A Clue Or A One-Way Ticket Outta Town

It is Sept. 1 and Baseball Prospectus has the Cubs with a 3.02989 percent chance of making the playoffs.  The only team in the NL with a lower percentage that is worth mentioning is the Florida Marlins at 2.45408 percent.

Um, is it too late for Jim Hendry to revisit the waiver claims on Rich Harden and Aaron Heilman?


I'm not advocating trading Harden, even though he struggled with his control (walking six batters in five innings) in a 5-3 loss to the Houston Astros, only hours after learning he wasn't going to Minnesota.  Harden must have really been looking forward to a trip to the Mall of America.  I only advocated trading Harden if Hendry had no intentions of re-signing the 27-year-old starter.  And if this (via Gordon Wittenmeyer) is any indication, it wouldn't surprise me if the Cubs bypassed getting two draft picks to reload a barren farm system.

As for Heilman, well, he still sucks despite throwing a pair of scoreless innings last night.  The Cubs should have taken any warm body in exchange for Heilman.  Having one Notre Dame suckfest on the team is bad, having two is a disaster.

Unless you didn't know, here's a newsflash for ya, Jimbo: It's Bears season.  It's time for fans to put away their offensive lawn mowing apparel and don their newly purchased Jay  gear.  Apparently, Kenny Williams got the memo ... but failed to forward it to his North Side counterpart.  Williams should probably be given AL Executive of the Year for getting two real-life baseball players in exchange for Jim Thome and Jose Contreras.  Then again, acquiring Alex Rios (.170/.190/.304/.493 since joining the Sox) and Jake Peavy (0-0 0.00 ERA in 0 IP since joining the Sox) eliminates him from contention.

At least Williams' White Flag Trade Remix wipes a few million bucks off the books and will give field manager Ozzie Guillen a chance to belittle prospects by cussing at them in Spanish see what the future holds.

Hendry says things would have been different if the Cubs were 15 games back, but after going 3-3 to start a homestand against baseball's worst team and the New York Mets' Triple-A affiliate, that's all I (or any Cubs fan with a pulse and a thought) needed to see to figure out whether or not the Cubs would be contenders down the stretch.


It's Sept. 1 and the Cubs have called up Jeff Samardzija, Bobby Scales, Andres Blanco, Micah Hoffpauir, Justin Berg, Esmailin Caridad, David Patton and Jeff Stevens.

If Hendry and manager Lou Piniella have an ounce of baseball intelligence left in their brain, they'll see what they've got in some of these youngsters over the final month before Hendry goes out and throws millions of dollars and overpays for over-the-hill stop-gap solutions.

Of course, that's assuming Hendry will have a job after the season ends Oct. 4.

Mythbusting: The 2009 Chicago Cubs

The Cubs have fallen and can't get up!

Contrary to popular belief ... a blog about disproving theories floating around Wrigleyville and the blogosphere.

Adding Milton didn't have to mean saying bye to DeRosa, Marquis

The Cubs did not have to get rid of Mark DeRosa and Jason Marquis to make room for Milton Bradley. DeRosa and Marquis made a total of $15.375 million this year. The first year of Bradley's contract was only worth $5 million. And with DeRosa and Marquis coming off the books after the '09 season, the two remaining years at $10 million each for Bradley would make sense.

Bradley = Edmonds, not DeRosa

The most polarizing right fielder since the last No. 21 to roam around the ivy-colored walls didn't replace Mark DeRosa at second, in fact, he hasn't played infield all year. Bradley, in essence replaced Jim Edmonds.

In fact, Hendry failed as soon as he targeted Bradley as a run-producing lefty stick. Bradley posted career highs in home runs (22), runs batted in (77) and OPS (.999) last season in Texas. His previous career highs in those categories came in 2004 with the Dodgers (19 HR, 67 RBI) and a .923 OPS in 2003 with Cleveland.

Despite the Raul Ibanez and Bobby Abreu love, the right choice was (and always has been) Adam Dunn. Hendry couldn't even put the blame on Dunn's defense, seeing that Crazy Uncle Milt touched the outfield as often as Mel Rojas converted saves for the Cubs in 1997. Jim Hendry takes responsibility for the suckfest that has been the 2009 Cubs. For most fans that means he's taking responsibility for Milton Bradley's slow start and lack of power.

Dunn has averaged 40 homers and nearly 100 ribbies in his big league career. At Wrigley, he owns a career 1.003 OPS and .286 batting average. Signing Dunn would have saved Hendry a few precious breaths of air when he laid this lollipop B.S. answer for the media about Milt's slow start, "'For whatever reason, we've had a history of guys who've come in the first year of their deals and it takes awhile."

Replacing DeRosa at second base was Mike Fontenot, who was coming off a season in which he hit .305 with 9 home runs and a .909 OPS in only 284 plate appearances and was scheduled to make $5,070,000 less than DeRosa in 209. But unlinke middle-infield partner Ryan Theriot, Fontenot had not yet seen the rigors of a full season. Aaron Miles was signed to a two-year deal to play second, short and third in a pinch. He was coming from a division rival, but also coming off a career-year. Hendry should have been wary of those factors before replacing DeRosa with the unknown.

There is, nor was there ever justification for the Kevin Gregg trade

The Kevin Gregg trade is even more puzzling than not replacing DeRosa with a proven major leaguer or signing Bradley. Trading away years of controlled Jose Ceda (a prospect once deemed untouchable enough to hold back in a trade for Brian Roberts) for one year (and $4.2 million) of a closer who faltered in a pitchers ballpark without much pressure. In a hitters park and the monumental weight of replacing a fan-favorite, Gregg absolutely collapsed. The Cubs had their closer-of-the-future waiting in the wings in Carlos Marmol and an up-and-coming Angel Guzman. Hendry's bullpen really faltered when they acquired Aaron Heilman ($1.625 million) while not being able to find LOOGY help in the process.

And really, it's not like Kerry Wood (15 saves, 1.381 WHIP, 4.71 ERA) is tearing up the world in Cleveland. Still would have been nice to get some compensation out of losing him to free agency.

Breaking up Blanco stunted Geo's growth

Letting Henry Blanco go sucked, but he hasn't come close to duplicating last years numbers. Neither has Geovany Soto, come to think of it. Maybe separating those two was like breaking up a group with two strong voices in unison, but two "meh" voices when apart. Bringing in Paul Bako is like asking your line-up to have an automatic out in it.

Demp dump

The biggest money-mistake was bringing back Ryan Dempster to the tune of $8 million in '09 and up to $40 million in the next three years. Want to know why there's no Jake Peavy on the North Side? There's part of the answer. There is no way to justify handing $52 million to Dempster who hadn't made at least 30 starts since 2003, while posting his most wins since 2001, most strikeouts since 2002 and lowest WHIP since 2000. Long story short, Dempster hadn't been a legit starter since the early part of this decade. Yes, Dempster had a great 2008 regular season, but when the pressure was on in October, Dempster's carriage turned into a pumpkin. So did the Cubs.

So, are Cubs fans right to call for Hendry's head? Of course. He spearheaded the dismantling of a 97-win team for the sake of change. (At least he manned up and took the blame for it.) Still, that kind of ignorance is a fireable offense. Here's hoping that Tom Ricketts sees it that way, too. If not, get ready for a rebuilding process at Wrigley that doesn't involve falling debris.

Though, in essence, it might as well.

A Message To Jim Hendry

Ryan Dempster sucks. Kevin Gregg sucks. Aaron Heilman sucks.

Carlos Zambrano is on the DL. Rich Harden is behind schedule in joining him. Randy Wells is approaching the innings pitched danger zone as a rookie.


The Cubs have holes in the rotation and in the bullpen. Yet, there is apparently no interest from the Chicago Cubs in free-agent John Smoltz. But the Cardinals do.

All they would have to do is pay the pro-rated minimum.

That's it.

If they can't do that done because of "impending ownership change" then let's fold the tents over at Clark & Addison and contract the damn team.

Jim Hendry, you suck harder than all of the losers I mentioned in line one. If I was Tom Ricketts, I'd have a nice message waiting on your voicemail for you....